Lol !!!!!!!!!
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4g joke thread
#61
Posted 24 March 2014 - 11:29 PM
Trust in the master of taxis.... He will set you straight[/quote]
#62
Posted 27 March 2014 - 02:29 AM
An Australian electrician dies in a car accident on his 40th birthday and finds himself at the Pearly Gates. A band is playing, the angels are singing, there is a huge crowd cheering and shouting his name, and absolutely everyone wants to shake his hand.
Just when he thinks things can't possibly get any better, Saint Peter himself runs over, apologizes for not greeting him personally at the Pearly Gates, shakes his hand, and says, "Congratulations son, we've been waiting a long time for you."
Totally confused and a little embarrassed, the sparky sheepishly looks at Saint Peter and says "Saint Peter, I tried to lead a God-fearing life, I loved my family and I tried to obey the Ten commandments, but congratulations for what? I honestly don't remember doing anything really special when I was alive. Is it because I'm an electrician - the Royalty of all Trades?"
"Congratulations for what?" says Saint Peter, totally amazed at the man's modesty. "We're celebrating the fact that you lived to be 160 years old! God himself wants to see you!"
The electrician is awestruck and can only look at Saint Peter with his mouth wide open. When he regains his power of speech, he looks up at Saint Peter and says "Saint Peter, I lived my life in the eternal hope that when I died I would be judged by God and be found to be worthy, but I only lived to be forty."
"No, that's simply impossible, son," says Saint Peter. "We've added up your time sheets."
#63
Posted 27 March 2014 - 04:31 AM
ON THE ENGINE STAND. g4cs 2.4l + Gt35r. PLUS: auto conversion + Awd coming.
thanks for parts and help: BMGTZ, EVOCPE, cwolf, Benozi, Jamo-GSR, 1JUM2NV, RXVII..much appreciated, cheers guys.
Aerodynamics are for people who can't build engines. —Enzo Ferrari
REMEMBER: you cant polish a turd, but you can roll it in glitter.
#64
Posted 02 April 2014 - 09:44 PM
We had an outage at my place this morning and my PC, laptop, TV, DVD, iPad & my new surround sound music system were all shut down.
Then I discovered that my iPhone battery was flat and to top it off it was raining outside, so I couldn't play golf.
I went into the kitchen to make coffee and then I remembered that this also needs power, so I sat down and talked with my wife for a few hours.
She seems like a nice person.
- MDK87 likes this
#65
Posted 03 April 2014 - 12:16 AM
ON THE ENGINE STAND. g4cs 2.4l + Gt35r. PLUS: auto conversion + Awd coming.
thanks for parts and help: BMGTZ, EVOCPE, cwolf, Benozi, Jamo-GSR, 1JUM2NV, RXVII..much appreciated, cheers guys.
Aerodynamics are for people who can't build engines. —Enzo Ferrari
REMEMBER: you cant polish a turd, but you can roll it in glitter.
#66
Posted 03 April 2014 - 01:38 AM
#68
Posted 05 April 2014 - 11:55 PM
Trust in the master of taxis.... He will set you straight[/quote]
#70
Posted 06 April 2014 - 05:14 AM
Picture of me and Lucy
*Rethought posting that image, mods may object.*
Can be seen here thou. http://xxxbunker.com...y_fat_guy-4.jpg
Edited by Geo&Kez, 06 April 2014 - 05:18 AM.
#71
Posted 06 April 2014 - 06:09 AM
- MDK87 likes this
Trust in the master of taxis.... He will set you straight[/quote]
#72
Posted 07 April 2014 - 11:33 AM
Picture of me and Lucy
*Rethought posting that image, mods may object.*
Can be seen here thou. http://xxxbunker.com...y_fat_guy-4.jpg
My eyes! My eyes!!
I'm bored. Jack, say something funny.
#73
Posted 07 April 2014 - 11:38 AM
#74
Posted 07 April 2014 - 08:23 PM
The wife suggested I get myself one of those penis enlargers ....... so I did....she's 19 and her name's Lucy.
LOL seems like the best kind of PE to get .
Edited by OLDIE, 07 April 2014 - 08:23 PM.
#75
Posted 10 April 2014 - 11:34 AM
.
For his birthday, little Aldo asked for a 10-speed bicycle.. His father said, 'Son, we'd give you one, but the mortgage on this house is $280,000 and your mother just lost her job. There's no way we can afford it.' The next day the father saw little Aldo heading out the front door with a suitcase. So he asked, 'Son, where are you going?' Little Aldo told him; 'I was walking past your room last night and heard you telling mom you were pulling out. Then I heard her tell you to wait because she was coming too. And I'll be damned if I'm staying here by myself with a $280,000 mortgage and no Fucking bike!
Edited by p055um5, 10 April 2014 - 11:34 AM.
- Geo&Kez likes this
#76
Posted 10 April 2014 - 11:51 AM
Trust in the master of taxis.... He will set you straight[/quote]
#77
Posted 14 April 2014 - 11:21 AM
I was reading an article last night about fathers
and sons and memories came flooding back of
the time I took my son out for his first pint.
Got him a Fosters ..... he didn't like it - I had it.
Then I got him Carlsberg, he didn't like it so I had it.
It was the same with Guinness and Cider.
By the time we got down to the whisky I could
hardly push the bloody pram home.
#78
Posted 28 April 2014 - 12:34 PM
My Grandfather was badly burned yesterday
*
*
They don't f**k about in that crematorium
When I go I want to go like my grandfather.
Peacefully in his sleep
*
*
Not screaming in terror like his passengers.
Still love the RVR but am paranoid about little noises
#79
Posted 20 May 2014 - 03:39 AM
My Grandfather was badly burned yesterday
*
*
They don't f**k about in that crematorium
Yeeeesssssssssss
#80
Posted 21 May 2014 - 11:08 AM
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